God bless the guidos. Whether you find that term offensive or endearing, you must admit you love “Jersey Shore,” the greatest reality show ever made (watch this “Soup” mashup). There’s drama, there’s nudity and there are ladies getting punched in the face (an MTV spokesman addresses that later). The female cast members claim they want to uphold the guidette code. From what I can tell, that code is being Italian, looking hot, and dating douche bags. In honor of all ladies who call themselves guidettes out there, I give you the 8 Greatest Guidettes Of All Time. Follow their example, bust out the duck lips and rock your fist pump like you just don’t care.
8. Snooki
If one female member (besides The Situation) of the cast of “Jersey Shore” appears on this list, it has to be Snooki (no “e” according to her MTV profile). She’s the modern day guidette. Watch her explain just why the word is not offensive. She’s really the voice of her generation.
7. Victoria Gotti
Is it just me or does Gotti’s son look EXACTLY “Jersey Shore’s” Pauly D? In this funny video from “Growing Up Gotti,” Victoria gets ready for a date. Damn, she looks fine. Damn, that guy looks like Pauly D!
6. Martin Scorsese’s Mom
Do you really think guidettes don’t age? They can’t stay hot, tanned and drunk forever. Apparently, they grow up and birth amazing film directors.
5. Tammy Pescatelli
Tammy Pescatelli is smart, pretty and can’t stop talking about liquor, being Italian and dating. The last three things make her one of our favorite guidettes, although I doubt she would enjoy being called one. Watch her talk about the time she almost became paralyzed at the Playboy mansion.
4. Stockyard Channing as Betty Rizzo
Rizzo was one of the first guidettes. People judged her because she was trashy and got herself a little bit pregnant. Who hasn’t felt like a broken typewriter at least once in their lifetime?
3. Jamie Lynn-Sigler as Meadow Soprano
Holy crap! Meadow Soprano is hot. Every single video featuring the “Soprano” star was either too violent or too dirty to post, so here is a hot picture of her. You’re welcome.
2. Lorraine Bracco
Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Melfi? Nope. Lorraine Bracco as Lorraine Bracco. This woman personifies everything the girls of the “Jersey Shore” want to be. She’s pretty, crazy and once married to Harvey Keitel.
1. Marisa Tomei in “My Cousin Videos”
You knew this was coming. How does she go to the bathroom in that outfit? Someone, please explain.
For more hot women that will never return your call, 15 Photos Of Women Being Douche Baguettes and the MTV’s response to the critics of “Jersey Shore.”
Posted by Danielle Evenson, whose biological clock is also stomping the floor.
